Sunday, January 4, 2015

New Year, New Everything

Over the summer we made the {difficult, wonderful, frightening} decision to move our fearless foursome to Massachusetts.
{It wouldn’t have been possible without my incredible parents inviting us to live with them—I don’t think they really knew how much these two little kids and their parents would change their quiet, relaxed lifestyle, but we are beyond grateful.}

The last couple of weeks in New York were hectic—to say the least—but they were also pretty fun. We had food delivered from every one of our favorite restaurants, Liam came to work with me, we walked Rock Center for the last time and hugged friends through tearful see-you-laters. Then we packed up our space and we were out of that place….

But this door, the red door leading to 3G will be etched in my heart for all time…. Seemingly nondescript, it opened up to many of my life’s most special moments and I will never forget it.
It was the first home Jesse and I had ever purchased, a home we renovated and decorated, a home that reflected our life and style.
Behind this door was our place of solace, where shoulders relaxed and feet were up—where we could eat peanut butter out of the jar or wear PJs all day without judgement.
It was where we learned we were going to be parents.
Where I daydreamed about mommy-hood and where I stood when we realized we needed to race to the hospital.
It was in front of this door where we paused to take a breath before walking through as a new family—bringing our newborn son into his first home, one that was already bustling with new {and excited!} grandparents, aunts and uncles.
It was there that first steps were taken, first words spoken and first foods eaten.
And where our son learned he would be a big brother.
There were dance parties and birthday parties—and potty parties.
It was through that door that we rushed to bring our second newborn son to see his brother.
It was where we first heard our boys make each other laugh, where we discovered that four people can fit in a queen-sized bed, well sort of.
Beyond this door the walls were covered in pasta, crayon, ketchup,'s a bit of a long list.
There were scraps, stitches, staples and seizures—and there was healing, happiness and hope.

That unassuming door, scratched by strollers and marked by tape {after displaying many toddler masterpieces,} was so much more than a simple entryway, it was a gateway to laughter, to love and to life—our life.

I was sad to see it close for the last time, but I am also so excited to see new doors opening all around us.
Happy New Year everyone.

Thursday, June 12, 2014

A Follow Up To: How Did We Get Here

Image:, "The Sleeve"
So today I saw this, it is such a such a great tool and way less frightening than the bulletproof blanket I posted yesterday.

Invented by teacher Daniel Nitzel, "The Sleeve" easily slips on and off the door's closer arm, securing it from the inside and nearly impossible to open from the outside.

Like I said, this is an awesome alternative to the "blanket," but it's still completely heart breaking to me.

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

How Did We Get Here?

Image: Business Insider, Bodyguard Blanket
I saw this online today and choked back a full-blown sob. Yes, it is what it looks like… bullet-proof nap mats designed specifically for school shootings. I just can't stop thinking about it. How did we get here?

This week marks the 74th school shooting since Newtown made us want to hug our children and never let go. But this blog is not about gun safety or gun-control laws, it is just me taking a breath and asking how did we get here, how do we move forward?

 I just can't fathom buying these "blankets" for my boys... I have never once felt fear dropping my son off at Pre-K—and I never want to. Nor do I want Liam to feel worried or fearful in an environment that's filled with love and learning.

Am I sticking my head in the sand? Maybe a little bit. But you know what? If I let that fear in, I don't think I could let it go.

But I do worry.... Is this where we are headed, bullet-proof nap mats? I really hope not, but how did we get here?

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Making A Quiet Comeback

No makeup, just me and the boys
So it's been a while since I have posted… I know that, you know that… Oh, you want to know why?
It's complicated.

I feel like this blog should be uplifting and motivating or st least upbeat and that hasn't been me for a while now. It's hard to type that but it's true.

I started to list out all of the things have been getting me down over the last couple of months and I was going to post them, but when I went to hit publish I thought about how ugly and negative that looked to me, so I deleted it.

Let's start fresh… speaking of I need to order scented diaper bags, yes they are biodegradable and YES they are a necessity—don't judge me.

Dress Up Diaries

Because you need a fedora and a cape to ride the bus in Queens.
Riding the ole Q16 in Astoria